I lost it...

Today was an INTERESTING day. i had to work all day today 11-10 and it didnt help that i didnt get enough sleep last night. So i go in with the mindset of "Fuck i dont wana work, how can i make dis go by fast". So i go in, and immediately sent outside to work by the big pool..Fuk mayn its like super hot nd shit.fuk.lol. So i go and its really windy..and it got so windy that it blew down are stand ..literally. I had to get help from guests nd shit.lol

So the day goes by and whatnot.Then im outside,...again but with Jordan..and we were talking and somehow got to the topic on religion. idk to me it kinda got intense.lol
It got to a scenario on
"IF YOU WERE IN AN AIRPLANE AND YOU KNOW THAT THERE IS A PARACHUTE UNDERNEATH UR SEAT RIGHT? AND THE PILOT MAKES AN ANNOUNCEMENT THAT WE WILL CRASH. YOU SEE PPL START JUMPIN OUT THE PLANE ONE BY ONE..DO I TAKE THE PARACHUTE AND JUMP?"

Parachute=faith

I had to think for a moment..cuz at this point of my life, i have lil faith.
"WHAT IF THE PARACHUTE FAILS?"

Parachute failure= Realization that there MIGHT not be a heaven or hell or god.

Why take the risk? right?
Then i started thinking more and more about Ok
What if she's right? What happens to Muslims then? Buddhists? Hindu's? Where are they gonna go? Hell? It just doesnt seem right if thats so. Just cause they believe in their own religion and not ours doesnt mean they deserve eternal damnation. Just doesnt seem right.

Me? i have lil faith. Just on what has happen to me in my life, all the bad shit..I just..Lost it...
She then goes"Well..do you think its worth it? to get your faith back in God?"..
..to be honest idk..I dont know..Maybe i do need to go to church often and actually pay attention. Maybe i Do need to get my faith back in Jesus and Believe in him and trust him..Maybe i do need to put on that parachute..and jump.